The past few months have been a struggle.
Not a “what else could go wrong?” struggle but a “lost in wonderland” struggle.
I’ve been overwhelmed and couldn’t figure out why. I’ve turned to scripture, I’ve sought therapy, I condensed my responsibilities best I could but I still felt like I was in a large room with a small door that I was too big to fit through.
All throughout December, I struggled to find the right potion that would shrink me in size so I could continue my journey in Tulgey Wood. I needed that word or mantra to help me focus and better my 2019.
In 2018, I focused on “progress” and used the saying “Strive for progress, not perfection” as my reminder when times got tough.
Identifying what I needed in 2019 wasn’t an easy task. I asked around for suggestions. I researched quotes. I listened to songs and watched favorite movies.
Finally, with knots in my stomach, my word came to me.
It’s terrifying and I feel like I’m going to get sick just thinking of typing it, but that proves my point all the better.
My word for 2019 is “brave.”
I’ve been too scared to drink the potions or eat the cookies. I’ll never be prepared to enter into Wonderland if I don’t take that bite.
I have to be brave.
I have to be brave enough to hand the reins over to God. I have to be brave enough to believe others can take care of themselves. I have to be brave enough to make the changes I want to see in my life, no matter how unconventional.
In searching for a quote to go along, I found one that seemed to help make the transition from 2018 to 2019 easier (especially since I’ve felt so attached to this year’s.)
“All progress begins with a brave decision.”
Every aspect of my life that I want to better can’t improve without a brave decision.
So that’s my prayer request for this year. Pray that I’m brave. Remind me to be brave even when I don’t want to. Send me texts or photos of verses or quotes that motivate you. Let’s watch Merida kick butt during a movie night. Sing me some Christina Perri in the car.
You get the idea.
This past year wasn’t anything too remarkable for me. I have a hunch 2019 is going to make up for that.
Cheers!
-Stephanie.